I’m not writing at the speed I want to. I’ve had motivation issues. I think the biggest problem is that I’ve gone so long since I wrote regularly that I’m fatiguing easily.
The words just don’t seem to come as fast as I would like them to. I’m not sure what the problem is. I don’t feel it the way I used to.
I like the characters I’m working on. I think I don’t know them well enough yet. This is a whole new series — a whole new world. Working through the plot and story beats helped, but I still feel like I’m missing something.
It might be a voice issue. I don’t think I found the right writing voice for this character yet. That is a problem when you’re writing in first person.
I don’t do a lot of writing in first person. I think my brain has a hard time separating my personal writing — such as this blog — from fiction writing when they write in first person. Everything comes out sounding like me. Maybe everything I write comes out sounding like me and I don’t care when I’m writing in third person.
I like my voice. That’s why I had a podcast. I can listen to myself on for days. Most of the people I know will tell you I listen to myself talk for days. I’m certain my mother would tell you I’ve done it since I was an infant. It’s just who I am.
But, I am not Vincent Solomon.
I haven’t found his voice. It is a little easier when I’m using dictation. The word count is a little better. But, I’m still getting used to using dictation. The natural rhythm I use doesn’t fit well with adding punctuation.
I think it’s going to just take time. I’ve got to rebuild my writer stamina and find the voice. And, if I continue to use dictation to do it, I’ll get my natural cadence down.
I know several writers who are using dictation regularly and the sheer volume of their work is impressive. I’ve also read quite a few of their books and enjoy them. There is a natural fluidity to the language they use. It seems to work well for them, and I feel like if I given enough effort and training. It will work well for me.
I’ve also taken the plunge and invested in a writing tool — ProwritingAid.
The one year subscription to the service was on sale a little while back I went ahead and picked it up. You might have noticed I’ve been using it on blog posts. It’s one reason I’ve had a significant decrease in the number of adjectives in my writing.
There is a lot of little turns of phrase I use often. They get repetitive even beyond adding no real value to the words.
I know I shouldn’t be editing the writing I’m working on right now. First drafts are rough, but, I can’t help myself. I’m not a clean writer. It is a testament to the skill my copy editor that there aren’t more typos in my books. As it is, there are far too many but I assure you there are much fewer now than there were when I finish with it.
If you don’t believe me, you can just go back to earlier blog posts on this blog. I did that and was angry at myself for publishing so many blatant mistakes.
That is the true benefit of a tool like ProwritingAid. I am training myself to be a better adherent to the laws of written English.
Yes, it is a distraction. Hopefully, a productive distraction.
I’m a little embarrassed to give an actual word count for this draft so I won’t. I can tell you that the story beats came out to about 8000 words and that I have not yet written that many words in this draft.
The real possibility of missing my end of March deadline is weighing on my shoulders but I’m trying hard not to let it bother me. I have a tendency when I’m behind to freak out a little. When I freak out. I shut down, and that means laying in a recliner covered in fried chicken crumbs and pretending that responsibilities don’t exist.
Can’t get any writing done that way. Also, my landlord and the utility company wouldn’t appreciate it.
I’m just going to make it a point to push myself harder every day. Yes, it is difficult. Yes, I am struggling. But, complaining and procrastinating won’t get the job done.
I need to remind myself why I’m doing this:
I will go insane if I do not infect the rest of the world with the madness building up inside my brain.
So, that’s what I have to report this week. I’m hoping to have a little better news for you on several projects in two weeks with that update.
Also, no matter how sad and pathetic it is, I will report my word count. I don’t have much choice. The next writing updates is on April 5 and I’m supposed to have this draft by then.
We’ll see where I’m at.
For now, you can look forward to Friday’s blog post about how disgusting it is that some men think it’s okay not to wear socks.