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[/media-credit]I am not a poet, but I took a poetry class my freshman year of high school, so I think I’m a pretty good expert on poetry. I even know some real poets, like Mark Stratton, who writes real poems. You can even buy some of them. I suggest you do, it’s worth it, both for the enjoyment of the poetry and as a deterrent from sparkly-vampires. Seriously, glitter-goths hate good poetry. I think it’s because good poetry lacks the proper rainy-soul-miasma to really get them into a good slump.
Me, I’m not a good poet.
I’m the other kind.
You know… The opposite of that.
But I am good at syllable counting and rhyming schemes!
As far as that one class I took 15 years ago is concerned, that basically makes me a master poet.
So here are some poems…. If you don’t like them, clearly it’s because you don’t get them… or something.
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Outside
It’s bright,
The sun burns,
Enemy of man,
provider of heat,
I say we kill it,
With fire…
Wait….
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Blogging
Jumbles of Words
Ranting in Motion
Prose over Verse
Then Comes The Big Reveal
I suck at this.
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Angst
No one understand why I do these things
I keep myself going on puppets strings
Dance for the demons of my head
Dance for the monster under the bed
The darkness is never quite broken
All the time the words are spoken
Seriously, potato.
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Nonsense
Telephones are hard to write on
Chocolate creamer in my tea
Gross but delicious all the same
I can’t believe I’m doing this
I must have nothing to say
Mark, I’m sorry
Poems are hard
This one is really bad
Please don’t judge me
Or do, I don’t care
I need more matchbox cars
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See, bad poems.
I hope they were bad enough to justify you reading them.
I’m not really a poet, but I wanted to spread some wings of whimsy and verse.
Thanks for indulging me.
Now, it’s your turn.
Write some bad poems (or good ones if you know how). It’s… liberating.
Mark says:
I am gratified to see that reached such levels of success in your endeavor to write Bad Poetry. I should be glad to read more should you desire to engage in this activity again.
M.A. Brotherton says:
Thanks! I just sort of typed everything that came into my brain… then I deleted some of it.
Stereo.* says:
Sorry but any poem that can make me chuckle is a success in my eyes. You’re going to have to try and find something else to be bad at.
M.A. Brotherton says:
I promise I will never stop looking for things to be horrible at. 🙂
mrs mediocrity says:
agreed, these made me smile. now i challenge you to write a limerick.
M.A. Brotherton says:
Ahem….
There once was a poet named Trevor
Who started a brand new endeavor.
He worked through the night
to make the poem just right
And prove to you he was clever.
Thank You, Thank You, I’ll be here all week.
Tracy Mangold says:
Not bad poems. Poetry is unique to the individual. They are only bad when they try to force really bad rhyme…which you aren’t doing… These are fun.
M.A. Brotherton says:
Soooo… next time I need more bad rhyming and less angsty soul miasma. Reading you loud and clear.
Joshua L. Brotherton says:
I need a T-Shirt that say “Seriously, potato.” That is awesome. Would go so well with Taco Viking!
M.A. Brotherton says:
I’ll work on that.