I am filled to the breaking point with Presumptions.
I presume I know what I’m doing.
I presume I know the truth.
I presume I’m right.
I presume you’re wrong.
I presume I’m smart.
Presumptions, yeah, that’s the word of the year, isn’t it. It’s mine, at least. Damn did I presume. So many things were supposed to happen this year. I was going to really take flight, burning across the sky like the monkey that accidently spilled some water in the Witch’s lab. It was going to be an easy year. It was supposed to be a year of success and exploration.
It didn’t turn out that way, and that’s okay. I’m tired of dwelling on the little things I can’t go back and change. Yeah, I screwed up. I admit that. I wasted the first part of this year waiting for something to give me that boost I was desperate to get. I wanted my Dumbo feather. I wanted a magic pencil.
There’s no such thing as a magic pencil, Matt-bo.
Here’s a thing that I’ve begun to learn. I’m not going to say that I’ve learned it. My head is thick and slow to accept these kinds of ideas. But, I think I’m beginning to learn it. It is starting to grind its way into my cave-man head:
ALL THAT MATTERS
IS THE ACT OF DOING
Maybe. Maybe that’s all that really matters, but I’m being inspired by my little brother tonight. His band, Maps for Travelers, is releasing their album tomorrow. (You can pick up your copy here.)
That’s some pretty big news for him, and generally for the members of our family. It’s exciting.
But you want to know why it’s inspiring me right now?
Because Zach didn’t just make an album. Maps isn’t his first band. He didn’t just pick up a guitar and decide to be a rock star. Well, he did, but it that was something like fifteen years ago, or more. Fifteen years is a long time to keep pursuing a dream, but really, it is just a drop in the bucket.
There’s no failure until you give up. Zach hasn’t ever given up. He’s played until his fingers bled and became scary bone-nubs through band after band for this opportunity. It’s a pretty awesome moment.
It’s something we can learn from. It’s something I can learn from.
So, this year was the year I presumed to believe that I would find a magic pencil that would turn me from a dabbling-doodler and mediocre wordsmith into some sort of genius of words and color.
But, there is no magic pencil, man. There is no magic pencil.
… I do all of this with a computer anyway.