I’ll admit it. I’m actively trying to do things that will increase my traffic here on the blog, possibly bring in new readers and lead me to a revolution in my life where I no longer have to go into my crappy job and get bitched at on the phone by customers all day. This may even lead to me not hating the rest of humanity, and in the end stop me from detonating the quantum bomb I tripped over in the park a couple of weeks ago. Ah, the good, almost impossible life…

I was actually sitting at my computer googling phrases like, “How to increase blog traffic,” when I came across a list of 202 Bite Sized ways to Increase Blog Traffic. Because, honestly, I have nothing better to do really, I started pouring over the list, thinking to myself, “yeah, that’s generic enough to probably work most of the time.”

 

Then I got to suggestion number 77, which reads: “Edit yourself without Mercy.”

Some part of my mind took that at it’s face value, meaning “RUN  A DAMN SPELL CHECKER YOU LOON,” but another part of me festered it about in the back of my head for a little while.

Then, just a short time later, it burst forth with like Athena ripping her way from Zeus’s brain.

I NEVER EDIT MYSELF!

 

Sure, I run spell check, and maybe even look over my grammar every once in a while, but I have a hard and fast rule about blogging:

Everything I do is real me.

I used to be nervous that crazy internet people would come out of the woodworks to chop me into bits if I was too honest or exposed.

Now, I know that crazy internet people might come after me, but some of them, some of the ones I think are the craziest and most dangerous, are on my side, because I’m a fucked up psycho, just like them.

 

So, if the solution to big hits in blog traffic is to censor and edit what you say, then I say, screw it.

I don’t really need readers anyway. All they do is muck up the place with comments or, Google +1’s, or Digg shares.

Who needs all that noise.

Not me…

Now where did I put my pants.