Edit: This post was supposed to go up on Tuesday, October 4. For some reason, known only to the WordPress Gods, it decided to hide in it’s little hole instead.
My legs hurt and I have a pretty nasty cough brewing in my chest. My head is even throbbing a little bit. I know I pushed myself too hard, but I still feel like I failed at my goal, and it was only the first day. When I decided to do the Couch to 5K, I had images in my head of me being suddenly able to sprint endless distances across the field, chasing down boffer guys ten years my junior. At no point did my imagination account for the fact that I am still a 350 pound man with bad knees and a half-a-pack a day habit.
Worse, I’ve forgotten how to properly run, and my ankles are telling me that is something I need to work on. I feel a little disappointed in myself because I didn’t even make it through the full cycle. I managed to do the sprints twice but had to walk the rest of the twenty minutes, out of breath and barely able to keep pace with my 54-year-old father.
Over the course of the last year, I’ve been fairly proud of myself for the weight I’ve managed to loose, and it came as a pretty big surprise to me to realize that I’m in probably the worse shape of my life despite that. It’s disheartening.
I’m not defeated, though.
I have a farther climb up the hill than I thought I did, but that doesn’t mean I can’t reach the top. It just means that I’m going to have to pace myself better.
Tonight I learned that I’m not ready for the jogging part. That just means that I have to start out by making sure I can walk the 3.1 miles. So, instead of trying to alternate jogging and walking for 20 minutes, I’m going to focus on building up my ability to walk for 3 miles without stopping. If that means focusing on one mile at a time, I guess that where I start.
There is no shame in taking extra steps, as long as I’m moving in the right direction.
Besides, I’ve got plenty of time left.