“You are the most stable person I know.” Well, that’s terrifying. I don’t generally think of myself as being a particularly stable person. I guess I’ve held down a job for a while, that’s probably something, but a lot of people do that. I would say that having my own home makes me pretty stable, but I wouldn’t be able to do it on my own. I get tons of help from my parents. Emotionally, I’m able to keep going these days, but I’m still a scared little boy that wants to talk to the quirky girl with the cute smile, but still can’t bring himself to do it. So If I’m the most stable person, the world is screwed. I do have a trick for making it look like I’m stable:
I plan for the government to collapse
I really do. I spend a substantial amount of time thinking about the skills and abilities a community would need to protect itself from the roaming bands of raiders and mooches. I’m not sure how that actually parlays into being a responsible adult. I think it comes from looking at what a community needs, and then applying that to my life. Really, its just a round about way of determining how I want the world, and my place in it, to actually be.
I know what I want to be.
- I want to be responsible for more than just myself. I want to make a difference in the lives of others, and be one of the voices that decides what is best for a community.
- I want to stand as an example of a person that can be looked to as honorable. Integrity seems to be dieing in the modern world, and I want to be part of bringing it back. Chivalry doesn’t have to be dead.
- I want to know just about everything. I constantly am searching cyberspace in an effort to increase my already annoyingly sizable and encyclopedic knowledge of trivial crap.
- I want to be suave. I like the word suave, and I would like to be a pretty smooth talker. I’d like to just talk my way out of any situation.
- I want to master the sword, so that when I do need to fight off raving bands of sociopaths, I will be able to do so. Also, swordsmanship is amazingly badass.
I guess I at least have that much going for me. Maybe that’s a step in the right direction. Now if I could just bring myself to talk to the quirky girl with the cute smile, I might be on my way to being a real boy.