#Reverb10 – Something I must do

When I received the email with the Reverb10 Prompt for today, I struggled with if I could or even should write what came to my mind first. When I read the words, it felt like salt pouring into wounds that were a bit more fresh than I realized.

“December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)”

The last couple of years of my life have been emotionally trying. I’ve gone through quite a bit of crap that I honestly never imagined happening to me. Some of it I have accepted and moved on, but other parts of it I’m having a harder time with. I guess I haven’t really let go of that yet. This year for me has been a year about accepting what I can’t change and changing what I can. It really has been a year of letting go, but its a work in progress. I’m a work in progress.

A lot of my time this year has been me looking at what I really want out of life, and analyzing who I really want to be. There are many things about myself that I want to let go of. I carry a lot of guilt about too many things to really be healthy. Worse, I carry a lot more ego than I’m entitled to most of the time, and that’s something I’m working on getting rid of also.

I don’t think, though, that the big things can ever really be fully let go of. The best you can hope is to stop thinking about them. Somethings are just too big to be fully left behind, and any reminder of them will still feel like fresh wounds, no matter how old they are.

That’s good, though. Somethings shouldn’t ever be fully let go of. Some people are worth holding onto, and some lessons are too important to ever forget.

These days, just about anyone can recite the Serenity Prayer, “Lord, Give me the Courage to change the things I can, the Strength to accept the things I can’t, and the Wisdom to know the difference.”